"Subtle" Drama

Okay, wised up a little today. Put the logs onto my flash drive so I could refer back today while I worked on a post. Don’t expect this level of brilliance to continue.

There was a lot of more subtle drama last night. The subtle stuff probably needs more explaining than the in-your-face melodrama that actually can be easier.

So, let’s start at the beginning. Frost had a hot cup of coffee. No big deal, right? It is to someone who could never eat or drink anything without turning it cold. It was too hot for Frost, though. Because he’s not used to it, or because the amulet is wonky? Good question.

(As an aside, I noticed this before, but… the NPC’s in Pocket D talk entirely too much. Shut up, already. And, there was a character in Pocket D while Frosty was having his coffee, talking in Broadcast named “MANCRUSH“ running around, saying “MANCRUSH mancrushes on“ and he‘d throw in a random name. *snicker*)

Oh, and we can’t forget E, Mason and Frost geeking out to Pikachu and friends. Fyre and I were both lost, and we both resisted commentating. Much.

That was Carnies and Praetorians. Frost has Carnie issues as we all know. But, he handled it well. Fyre and I are of the opinion it was mainly because there were about seven Carnies in the whole mission. The team backed him up, both with tactics and with moral support. But is that going to be enough if there are hordes of Carnies? It’ll be interesting to see.

Small detail Fyre noted: Mason mentioned Jack. Very minor mention, but it’s the first time she’s heard Mason talk about him since he was angry at Jack about the Star thing. Mean anything? Maybe not, but noted.

Frost called it a night, and E, Mason and Fyre did an uneventful Nemesis mission.

And then Malta. Fyre actually should have been more panicky, but I backed off a little. I’m probably… failing the character some, but I just can’t do long drawn out melodrama, I think. I made an effort, but I’m not sure how well it worked. Instead of totally freaking when she saw the Malta, she zoned out for a few minutes. She stayed that way through mission, in some degree or another. If someone would ask her now what happened during the mission, she wouldn’t remember much.

E and Mason tried to convince her there was nothing to worry about. Fyre said she didn’t want to do it, and E told her, “Someone’s going to die if we don’t.” In Fyre’s not-quite-correctly-functioning mind, she heard that someone else was more important than she was. After all, someone already had died, and she isn’t looking forward to doing it again. Then, E tried to make a joke. Mason jumped to her defense, and possibly even over-reacted a little. Having Mason defend her to E woke her up a little. It’s not supposed to work like that, after all, right?

Fyre was hesitant, timid, and quiet. Again, I may have been too subtle. Fyre doesn’t necessarily like fighting, but she’s never been hesitant about jumping in, even if it gets her beat up. She figures it’s just something that needs to be done, and trying to avoid it doesn’t get anyone anywhere, and usually just makes it worse.

Mason said, “I don’t remember them hitting that hard.” Fyre wanted to argue. Of course they hit hard. She’s proof. Then he qualifies it by stating that it was when he was covered in rock. “Oh,” she says. That does change it. She knows that he still has issues with not being as tough as he was, so she understands. And, it does make sense.

It was bound to happen, but there was a Malta Quantum. That revs up the panic level some. And it was about this time that I realized the game was trying to help me out. Fyre has the Warshade version of tp-foe. (Picked up in the last power-picking round, it’s brand new, unslotted) And it wouldn’t hit a damn thing. Well, that’s perfect, isn’t it? Fyre’s light-headed from panic, she’s shaking, she’s about to run out the door, or throw up, or something. Of course she can’t hit anything. I couldn’t have planned it better. (For actual use, that power needs an accuracy, stat.)

A few groups later, E wants to send Mason in his dwarf form into the room first. What?! They’ve been trying to tell Mason that he’s not a tank, pointing that it usually ends in a face-plant, and E wants to use him as a tank now? Is he trying to kill Mason, or what? Fyre wanted to argue, but Mason didn’t wait for it. And he was fine.

Next group, sapper. Uh-oh. Sappers aren’t fun, even when your character’s not deathly afraid of them. (This was the only sapper in the entire mission. I think they try to break new people in on Malta easy. Because I KNOW they usually aren’t this easy. I’ve been stomped by gunslingers and sappers way, way too many times). E suggests another teleport, setting the sapper “right where Doppy can see him.” Fyre has been thinking about E’s ghosts, and their real role. She’s starting to feel bad for them, even. So, she apologizes to Doppy first, then misses, again.

Mason makes a meant-to-be-harmless comment and spurs Fyre into a mini-anxiety-attack. Which, again, I probably under-played. She settles down, tries again, hits, they move on and rescue the hostage without much further incident.

The hostage identifies E by name, and Fyre thinks she recognizes him. E’s player had sent me a tell earlier, and we decided that the hostage is one of Fyre’s “people.” Styrm missed his deadline, remember? He’s going to step it up. He doesn’t seem like he’d take losing very well, so she’s been expecting something. Fyre would have made a phone call and confirmed that it was one of the people she’d had guarding E, though she’d called off that guard once they all realized that the ghosts weren’t going to let anything get past them. Of course, that’s what she was going to do. But, roadblock.

Fyre’s been rubbing the back of her neck. She has a scar there, from the Malta ambush that killed her. Remember, Fyre is still rather vain. Not only does she have an imperfection, but she’s carrying a reminder of a traumatic death. (is that redundant? Can a death be not traumatic? Anyway…) I don’t think she even realizes she’s been doing it, but when Malta comes up, she reaches to touch the scar.

(No, E, it’s NOT a crescent moon shaped scar. But… On that subject, Fyre has been wearing a purple crescent moon as a brooch on her cape since level 30, on the purple outfit. I know, it’s small. I changed the shade of the clothes once, and the cape once, and lost the fishnets, but the brooch has been there, untouched, for 12 levels. And no one’s noticed. What’s it mean? Nothing? Who knows?)

Mason has noticed her motions. She did it again when they were leaving the mission. He says she needs a massage. She catches what she did and figures Mason thinks she’s too tensed up. She thinks about it, and it sounds like a good idea, so she says she’ll call her masseur. Mason hesitates, then says, “Maybe I could do it for you.”

Hold on, time out!

The first time that E touched her more than casually was after a mission against something with a TON of knock back. Fyre didn’t stay on her feet for more than couple of minutes at a time, and complained about being sore. E offered a backrub. Fyre pointed it out to him then, and it should be a universal rule, if a man suggests a back rub, he’s got a lot more than a back rub in mind.

But, wait… Mason’s gay, right? Right? Isn’t he? Oh, sure, he’s said, “I’m not gay,” but that’s not what he meant, right? He’s just not ready to admit to total gay. He says he still likes looking at the Carnies, and he complimented the “hot little number” Fyre wore to lunch. But, women know they can admire and appreciate other women, and not be attracted to them. Fyre’s even told Frost he looks good in his cowboy hat, but that doesn’t mean she wants him. Mason wants E, certainly not Fyre.

Whew. Nothing to get worked up about. Right?

E doesn’t seem so sure. He takes an unfocused, round-about shot at Mason. Crackerjack box… Yeah, anyway. E goes off to talk to his contact.

Mason, somehow, has become the group comforter. He’s the one who talks E down when the Circle sends him into scared-out-of-his-mind-babbling mode. He’s the one who stands between Frost and the Carnies, and now Fyre and Malta. Right now, she doesn’t have any conflicts going with Mason, and again, if he’s gay, there’s no confusion. E has entirely too many of his own issues. She doesn’t trust his actions or motivations right now, and he’s not doing so hot a job at the comforting. So, she’s going to gravitate toward Mason for the moment, when she needs someone.

She has sympathy for him, too, for what she sees as his unrequited love for E. When he says how brave she was for facing Malta, she protests, and adds that she couldn’t have done it without Mason and E. She qualifies her statement when E asks over the comm by saying that he and the ghosts did a lot of the work. Mason says, “Don’t ever forget about E,” and seems upset. She sees it as Mason thinking about his feelings for E.

E comes back in time to say he’s calling it a night. He has mysterious “appointments” the next day again. Fyre tries to get him to explain what, but he avoids the question. He also references a comment Fyre made a long time ago, which I don’t remember completely, but it was something about cockroaches and E, and it wasn’t nice. Fyre flinches but doesn’t argue.

Mason offers to walk Fyre back to Pocket D, where she decides her next stop is.

Now, I’m going to go off on a small tangent here. Mason had said at one point that Fyre liked to hang out at Pocket D. She actually doesn’t. Back when she had a demon and an evil sorceress whispering in her ear, she was afraid to be around people. If she wasn’t with the E or the team, she stayed away from people. If she failed for a minute, Katherine was going to start killing people, whoever she could reach. The less people around her, the better. With the threat of that, and her early lack of control of her powers, she didn’t even want to meet Jen when E wanted her to. She got over most of that, and obviously met Jen and spent time with her, but Fyre still didn’t like crowds. Too many targets, still, and later, too many potential enemies. Later, she got used to E being around, but when he was gone, she felt more alone than ever. And recently she’s almost afraid to be alone. In Pocket D, she can be alone with people around. She can’t hurt anyone there, and no one can hurt her. She can’t sleep, and she’s way too stressed. So, she spends as much time as she can stand there, off and on.

They get there, but Mason’s ready to pass out, and Fyre protests that she does NOT need a baby-sitter, so she sends Mason on his way.

And that’s where we all left it. Thursday is supposed to be villain’s night, but I don’t know if we can let the angst rest for an entire night. We’ll see.

Oh, and just to keep you updated: I still hate I9. I got an orange salvage drop last night. It was only worth about 5k. *sigh* Apparently, I9 doesn’t like me much, either.

Random Thoughts

Last night was pretty uneventful, in comparison to other nights with Team Angst, at least.

Mason talked to Frost, apparently, but was a little vague and brief when he told Fyre and E that they talked. I expect to hear more about that, both IC and OOC.

Fyre and E ended up on their own for a bit, but both the characters and players avoided “drama.” I don’t have the logs, so I’ll try to paraphrase the only thing that seems to have stuck in my head. Fyre and E were on that big ruined map, the one that sort of looks like the ritzy section of Boomtown, chasing Clockwork. I hate Clockwork on that map. They’re too hard to see. Anyway… E’s phantom did something or other, and E said something about wondering why Doppy (the phantom) sometimes charges into things. Fyre, speaking before thinking as she often does, says maybe he’s mad because he’s dead. E says maybe, and suggests something else. Fyre starts to say something and stops. E prompts her, and she covers it with a joke, saying maybe he’s just cranky because he didn’t get his morning coffee. E laughs and they move on. What she was going to suggest, though, was that maybe he was mad because he was being forced to protect the person who killed him. Does she really think that way? Maybe, maybe not. Luckily, she caught herself before she said it.

And now I find myself with free time and no big events to rehash. Perfect time for random thoughts.

I listen to music, a lot. I also tend to associate certain people or situations with certain types of music or songs. Of course, the majority of my mental music library starts about 1987. For example, after the E/Fyre/Serra thing, I kept hearing “Breath,” by Breaking Benjamin. Fyre, by herself, makes me think of a couple of songs off the newer Evanescence album, The Open Door, “Weight of the World,” and “All That I’m Living For,” if you’re keeping track. I think Fyre probably hears, “Fighter,“ by Christina Aguilera in her head a lot. Mason, especially when he was doing his “I’m a bad, bad man,” schtick, made me think of “Behind Blue Eyes,” the Limp Bizkit version. All of Cass’s costumes have sunglasses, except one, because of the glare of the invulnerability power sets. I feel like I need sunglasses for it, so Cass wears them instead, so I hear “Sunglasses At Night,” by Corey Hart sometimes for her. Just cruising through the map, especially Steel Canyon, for some reason, I hear “Fascination Street,” by the Cure. Any time I hear “Alien Sex Fiend,” by Garbage, I think of the Kheldians in the game, especially the Warshade that I deleted., who was a not-entirely-reformed Nictus. Blaze gets “Witchy Woman,” the version by Babes in Toyland (which is, by the way, really, really hard to find.) I have a bunch more, but I’ll stop now.

Oh, yeah, and if I haven’t said it before… I hate I9. Crashes, lag, and bunch of enhancement stuff to re-learn. Oh, sure, I made a few million influence, and that was okay, something different to do. An orange drop was fun. But, then I decided to start playing with IO’s. Sure, that was fun for awhile, too. I even bought an invention table for the base. And THEN I paid 5 million influence for one piece of orange salvage for a yellow recipe. Yeah, so, like I said, I9 sucks. I’ve read-- I should say, I’ve TRIED to read all numbers and percentages that Keen, Mason, and others have posted. I get so far, and it all runs together. I don’t get it, and I guess I don’t care enough to work through it. If I wanted math, I wouldn’t have skipped all those algebra classes in college (and I do mean ALL. Still passed, somehow). So, I’ll “play” with them a bit, but I just can’t get serious about it. Still waiting for a nice, expensive wing drop, though.

Now, on to see what other mayhem Team Angst gets into.

Taskforces, Drama, and More Drama

So, a lot happened last night.

Oh, and we finished the first Shadow Shard Task Force, too. Quarterfield. Blaze now has 3 of the 4 Shard TF’s. This is semi-remarkable because 1) I hate task forces. I just don’t have the attention span for them, and I’ve done too many with PuG’s that I really don’t want to spend that much time with. Task Force Sundays, thankfully, have been the exception. We have good players, and good people, which makes the “ordeal” much easier. But, 2) I hate the Shadow Shard. Yes, it’s pretty. No argument there. Yes, it’s nice to do something different. But, it’s too freakin’ big. It’s too hard to get around. I dread taking my super-jumping scrapper there. And, I’ve given Fyre IC reasons for this, but it makes me dizzy and a little sick. I think it’s the 3D travel. Nothing is linear. The “islands” are above, below, off at angles. The more traveling, the more it bothers me. Luckily, I didn’t get much of that at all throughout the task force.

On to the drama. We’ll start slow.

Mason switched back to his old armor now that he has an enchanted mace, courtesy of the Vagabond. The blue and white on his new uniforms really looks good with his new hair. Let’s face it: Mason’s hot. I know it, Fyre knows it, Mason knows it. No one’s going to argue that. I was concerned about the white hair, but it’s working for him.

Frost has a magical amulet, courtesy of the Wombat (by the way-- Suicidal Wombat: Best. Name. Ever.) Where it came from was unclear at first. Fyre was suspicious, but trying not to get E worked up in Frost’s direction.

Fyre likes Frost. (Just “like,” before anyone gets ideas. This stuff is complicated enough!) She considers him a good kid. Yes, “kid,” even though if I remember correctly, Frost is older than she is. Frost is the only one of them that isn’t “broken” and bitter. Fyre would like to keep it that way, and figures the rest of them feel the same.

E caught on, though, and was close to ripping into Frost. After calming down and questioning Frost more closely, the origins of the amulet were established (or were they?) but the effects are still more than questionable. Fyre suggested that Vagz and Blaze take a look at it, since they were already on the case of the locket that Strym offered Fyre.

Almost forgot the part where Mason asked Fyre if she was “crazy.” Harmless comment, right? Not to someone who was committed against her will to a Victorian horror of a mental institution. Fyre did doubt her own sanity, both from the visions and suggestions that Katherine forced on her, and the things that went on in the asylum. And Mason didn’t do such a good job of backing out of it, even though he was, or seemed to be, trying. E noticed, and got the hell out of the way, even though the explosion was avoided.

And then we move on to the dreaded Malta mission. One of the very few times I’ve had to work myself up to something in the game, game-wise or RP-wise. Fyre was going to freak. There was nothing I could to do to get around that. But, like I said when E and I talked later, I could only plan out the first two minutes. Everything else depended on other people’s reactions and other things. Just for a small example, when Fyre ran out of the mission, she ended up boxed in, with walls on 3 sides. I couldn’t have planned that. Being cornered panicked her more.

Another thing I hadn’t planned on was E’s extreme reaction. I probably should have, I guess. Fyre didn’t expect it, either, and it did freak her out more.

Going back over the logs, which I won’t post (*coughMasoncough*), I see it’s even more complicated than I thought it was. So, just in the order that it occurs to me:

E’s ghosts freak Fyre out. Panicked, it was worse. She had thought that their appearance meant that E was forgiven for killing them, in some cosmic fashion. After Blaze told her the real reason why they were there, they remind her that he’s a killer. She didn’t want them anywhere near her.

Poor Mason. Fyre wasn’t in any condition to appreciate him, and in fact was getting angry at him, probably mostly out of habit. She shoved him at E because she thought that’s where he wanted to be. Later when she has time to think about it, she’ll see what we all see, that he was torn. Seriously. Poor Mason.

Fyre doesn’t blame E for Malta attacking and killing her, at least not consciously, or she wouldn’t have kept their reasons to herself for so long. She knew that he would blame himself, though, so, in her mind, she was protecting him, again. She should have predicted his reaction, in hindsight, but, as in the real world, hindsight is 20/20.

So, she did go back into the mission, due to Mason’s insistence, E’s heedless running in, and her player’s lack of anything else to do with her. She didn’t exactly get over it. She went in, because she HAD to, but she’s still going to have issues anytime Malta comes up. And I think there’s going to be a lot of Malta coming up. We’ve worked it into the story-line.

Skipping ahead: Mason admitted his feelings to E. It actually wasn’t that dramatic. While they talked, Fyre pretended not listen, but she and I both did. Fyre’s relieved. If Mason’s gay, then whatever confused feelings she has about Mason, she can disregard. She wasn‘t just relieved, she was happy about it, and even asked Mason to lunch again. She did have an alternative motive there. Tuesdays have been a day she’s had set aside to spend with Jen. Jen is in an undisclosed location that even Fyre doesn’t know. She’s worried, but she also doesn’t want to let on that she’s worried, and cause the rest of them, especially E, to worry. She’s rather have them suspicious of her than worry about Jen’s safety, if it comes to that. She also offered to get Mason a job. Vagz had suggested Mason get a job in construction. Coincidentally, Kelly Enterprises, Alexandra’s company that she inherited from her father, started as a lumber supply company, long ago, and their major focus is construction and construction equipment (yes, really. I picked that a long time ago, when I first drew up the background.) She figures he’s too smart for straight construction. He doesn’t want a cube job, so she’s thinking a salesman job. Mason’s social, personable when he wants to be. It should be a decent fit. She’ll pitch it to him at their lunch.

As far as E goes, aside from the Malta stuff, Fyre’s sort of avoiding him still. She isn’t sure of her feelings, and she doesn’t want to talk about Jen with him. She doesn’t entirely trust him, for various reasons with various things. She doesn’t want to point any of that out to him, though, because she suspects he won’t take it well.

I have a feeling I’ll have more to add tomorrow. I don’t think tonight will be quiet!

Evolution of a Hero

So how did a spoiled, socialite party girl (Think Paris Hitlon. Now subtract the skank, and the sex tape. Add an "evil step-mother" and at least part of a brain. Oh, and make her actually pretty) become a super-hero? Why, by being cursed by a wicked witch, of course.

Short version: Katherine Smith was burned at the stake in colonial Salem. She made a deal with a demon to survive it, which she did as a spirit, bound to the demon. Captivity by the demon, however, has made her insane, and the only thing she wants is to kill and destroy. She sees it as revenge, on everyone and everything. Certain of her descendants, born with the right combinations of magical ability inherit her powers over fire, gained from the demon, who wants loyal servants in "this" world out of the deal. So far, at least two of those servants have ended up in the Rogue Isles. Some have committed suicide, either to get away from Katherine and the demon or just driven insane, and a few have simply disappeared, never to be heard from again.

When the last previous descendant died, Fyre (just Alexandra then) started having nightmares of scenes of terrible fiery destruction, which progressively got worse. Though she eventually wasn't sleeping, the nightmares became daytime hallucinations. There were several inexplicable fires. All this was the excuse that her fiance and mother used to commit her to an insane asylum, actually a crooked establishment used to house inconvenient people. Katherine had the perfect opportunity to torment and cajole her newest victim, and eventually, the asylum burned down, killing four not-so-innocent people. Fyre told E once that it was Katherine who did that. In her mind, it was Katherine's fault. It may have been Katherine's idea, but it was Alexandra who walked through the hospital, trailing fire and searching for the people she thought should burn. She was all kinds of traumatized and drugged out of her mind, but she did it.

This, by the way, is one of the big reasons why she identified with Mason so much that she posted his bail and at least attempted to forgive him, despite E's thoughts, opinions and arguments.

She came to Paragon to ask for MAGI's help in dealing with Katherine and the demon. They saw more canon fodder... I mean, of course, another hero, and put her to work. They had an inexperienced, fragile blaster-type, and thought they'd had the perfect partner for her: a battle-hardened, healer-type with mind powers, who could keep track of her if she went off the deep-end and started burning everything in sight. Big mistake.

Fyre hated, HATED E. He was cocky, arrogant, and tried to tell her what to do. He was a "doctor," just like her ex and those "doctors" that tormented her in the hospital. Worse, he had those mind powers. Did she understand them? Not exactly. All she knew was that no one else was getting in her head. She already had a crazy-evil sorceress and a demon, and that was entirely too much. Still worse, she found out after awhile that E wasn't so bad, so she had to push harder and find more things to keep him away. E, obviously, wasn't going to stand for the way she treated him and pushed back, which gave her more ammunition.

There's no way those two would have stayed working together. Except the players made them. Stuck together, they would have killed each other. We kept the violence to a minimum.

Katherine thought she'd found the perfect ally. A villain with mind powers, put in charge of her latest victim. When she found out that she couldn't get to E, she went after Fyre more than ever, enraged. Fyre finally broke down and told E what was happening, and that helped them get along better. A little. For awhile. Sort of.

Some of the most important things to remember about Fyre: She doesn't like being a hero. She doesn't feel like a "hero," even after all this time. Especially at the beginning, she was afraid of everything. She's not the kind to run away, screaming (Um, often... ), but she was, and sometimes still is, afraid of the things they fight. She doesn't have "fun" in missions, like some of the others (except for that one mission right after I got the level 32 "nova" on blaster-Fyre and Mason and Fyre ran though the mission, blowing up large groups and giggling, where E thought she'd lost her mind). Fear translates into sarcasm, crankiness, and a general bad mood (Uh, usually). She wanted rid of her powers, so she could go back to a normal life. She still thinks, sometimes more often than others, of ditching Serra and taking off for anywhere that isn't Paragon City. She probably would, except she just doesn't think it would be that simple. And, "heroing" has become a habit. She's used to it, by now, even if she doesn't like it. At least, for now, that's enough.

And another aside... when creating Fyre's backstory, given all the horrible things that had happened to her (as I've mentioned before, once I realized how traumatized she must be from everything, I almost scrapped her story and the entire character), I realized I had to give her some sort of plus. Yes, thanks to the character creator, and some of her story, she was gorgeous. She had some money. She wasn't particularly brilliant; she didn't have any family or close connections; her powers, especially at that point, weren't all that great (I had no concept of the potential awesome-ness of the fire blast sets), her social abilities were based on her good looks and money... hey, money. Let's give her a lot of money. A LOT. I thought that was mostly cosmetic. And then various problems came up. E needs a lawyer to get Jen back, but can't afford a good one? Well, Fyre can. Jen needs guards and Longbow is suspect? Fyre can hire the best, and lots of them. Mason needs a million bucks to get out of jail? Pshaw, only a million?

And Fyre has evolved. She's a lot smarter than she was, has tons of experience, and doesn't trust anyone. No one. (Which has been and is being continuously reinforced) She's had people working on the Strym problem for awhile, and has had people protecting Jen for longer. Of course she had a plan to keep Jen safe from Strym, or anyone else that was after her. The fact that Mason, and possibly Frost, see her as suspect for that isolates her further from the group, which probably makes her look more suspect, and the reactions to that isolate her more AND adds to her distrust of the others, and people in general. Vicious cycle? Maybe, unless something breaks it.

Edit: Updates and commentary on stuff I almost forgot about: Fyre has been sort of in her own little world the past week. She's had a ton of things on her mind. Maybe most importantly, what's going to happen when Strym realizes he won't reach his Friday deadline? She feels that she's protecting the others by keeping them in the dark, but she's not sure that's how it's going to work, so that adds to the worry. She's afraid for herself, them, Jen, everyone. She's barely noticed whatever's going on with Mason and Frost, and she's trying to ignore E on purpose. She knows that not knowing where Jen is or what's happening to her must be killing him, and she doesn't want to give in and give him information that might put him at risk, or, possibly either purposely or accidentally, cause him to ruin the plan.

Villians' Night

Brief. I promise, brief. Really.

Thursday night is apparently Villians' Night in some parts of the world. Who knew? Mason asked E and me along. I was hesitant. CoV... isn't my favorite. But, I haven't played it for a good while, so I figured I'd give it a shot.

I'll admit, it was fun. Lots of fun. E and I created alts forever ago. The first ones we tried, mine was a level 12 Mastermind. Mastermind? I hate Masterminds. What was I thinking? It took a bit, but I picked back up again, and it was a lot of fun. I think the team had a lot more to do with it than the AT. E's character kept him uncharacteristically quiet *cough,cough* but Sybil's fun, sort of a mean version of Fyre. Sort of. I think if we keep it up, Sybil and Sapphire Night are going to get into it. (Yes, that's a "lol.")

E and I switched to our 19's, my dom and his corruptor, but I was really too tired to enjoy it by then. Plus, Lily's timid and quiet, so not so much fun in a big group.

But, thanks, Futura Force, for inviting us along. I look forward to the next experiment in villiany.

E, Serra, and more about Serra

I’ll save most of my comments for the end. This was the night after E and Fyre talked and argued about Fyre’s Kheldian merger. Did I need to post the whole thing? Well, not necessarily, but I could, so I did.

E.VAC: Fyre.
Obsydian Fyre: No.
E.VAC: ...no?
Obsydian Fyre: Your "Fyre," Alexandra, isn't here right now.
E.VAC: Alexandra is dead.
Obsydian Fyre: To you, if you choose. In reality, she's angry and hurt, and has chosen not to deal with you anymore. She's pushed me to the forefront, which I hadn't realized she was strong enough to do.
E.VAC: If she had lived, she would have found a way to help me when I needed her most.
Obsydian Fyre: You're ascribing powers to her that she never possessed, such as reading the future and minds, it appears.
E.VAC: I called out to her again and again. Unleashed my pain. My fear. My love. My need. She would've known I was in trouble when I didn't return on time. She would've come looking for me.
E.VAC: She would've heard me.
Obsydian Fyre: She doesn't possess the type of mind powers that you do. Absolutely none. And, even if you were capable of causing her to hear you, which I find unlikely, she spent over a week drugged, both to ease her physical pain, and to prevent her from acting out her fear and causing herself harm by leaving the hospital.
E.VAC: Look, Serra... if that is your name... I told you where we stand last night. You're not in my head. You can't convert me with your lies.
Obsydian Fyre: As you say, then. I have no cause to lie to you, and no real wish to discuss your issues with you. My only concern is for Alexandra.
E.VAC: Oh, yeah. You Warshades. Famous for your self-sacrifice.
Obsydian Fyre: I would think you of all people, with your history such as it is, would be more sympathetic. I am beginning to see that you are not as Alexandra had come to believe that you were.
E.VAC: You don't know a thing about me, squid.
Obsydian Fyre: Nor do I care to. My role here is as an observer. I had planned to accomplish that differently, but Alexandra has caused my plans to change. The result will be the same, but the method changed.
E.VAC: Like I care about your plans.
E.VAC: You killed the woman I loved.
Obsydian Fyre: I was able to save Alexandra when no one else was able. I don't expect praise from you for that, but nor did I expect outrage and hatred. Losing her is a result of your actions, however.
E.VAC: You didn't save her. You raped her. Tricked her into accepting you into her mind. Something she would *never* have done. Saving her would've been a trip to the hospital.
E.VAC: And now you dare to wear her face and speak with her voice and pass judgment on me.
Obsydian Fyre: I pass no judgment. I'm simply explaining the effect of your actions.
E.VAC: I gave everything to help Alexandra. I did everything I could to keep her alive under the most dire of circumstances. And in my hour of greatest need... she wasn't there. Because you *took* her from me.
E.VAC: A woman who wouldn't so much as let me share her emotions is sharing head-space with a space-squid.
Obsydian Fyre: You have been told of the occurrences that lead to my merging with Alexandra. If you choose not to believe the facts that were presented to you, that is your decison.
E.VAC: I believe every part of it except where you climbing into her skull and whispering things into her brain was the only way to save her.
Obsydian Fyre: You have experience with the Malta group. You should see the probability of what occurred.
E.VAC: I've saved dozens of lives on the brink of death. Fyre's more often than most. You're trying to feed a line of BS to someone who knows a little something about the subject.
Obsydian Fyre: You believe Malta incapable of killing one of Paragon's heroes?
E.VAC: I believe that if there was one way of saving her life, then there were others. And Kheldian-bonding isn't in any medical procedure I've ever heard of.
E.VAC: I find it much more likely you'd been stalking Fyre. Coveting her body and her power for yourself.
E.VAC: Now whether you set up the ambush yourself or just saw it as a great opportunity, I may never know. But either way... I find it very likely you did this to her.
Obsydian Fyre: I had not been planning on sharing my own theory with you, human, but your accusations leave me little care. I believe you are motivated simply by guilt and jealousy. And more close-mindedness than you humans normally possess.
E.VAC: Must be great to be so superior to us.
Obsydian Fyre: To the human race as a whole, no. Merely different.
E.VAC: Well. At least you're not pretending to be her any more. That's a step.
Obsydian Fyre: As I have informed you, she is currently forcing me to be the primary personality. I can only hope this is a temporary situation.
E.VAC: Mm-hm.
E.VAC: So are we beating up badguys today? Or just lecturing me?
Obsydian Fyre: I don't believe lecturing you for an eternity would aid Alexandra in any way, shape, or form, so I have no wish to do so.
Obsydian Fyre: "Beating up bad guys" appears to be the best course of action, until the situation changes.
E.VAC: Great. So where're we going?
Obsydian Fyre: I will be continuing Alexandra's quest to rescue the Warshade known as Shadowcatcher. If you can control your hatred, I believe the aid of one with powers such as yours will make that quest easier.
Obsydian Fyre: If, however, you feel the need to excuse yourself, I will continue on my own.
E.VAC: Like I said last night: I'm on your side. Just don't expect us to be friends. Ever.
Obsydian Fyre: I have no wish to be friends with you. I will seek to absent Alexandra and myself from you as soon as possible. I believe your presence is the cause of Alexandra's retreat, and I wish to reverse that.
E.VAC: Whatever.
Obsydian Fyre: However, that must wait until the current objective is reached.
The conversation runs throughout the mission here. The Circle of Thorns has forced a
seperation between the Kheldian, Shadowcatcher, and his human host, Lars Mendelson

[NPC]Lars Mendelson: Thank you, Obsydian Fyre! I must tell you what they've done!
E.VAC: Hmm...
E.VAC eyes Fyre speculatively
Obsydian Fyre: You, however, believe Alexandra to be dead, and so unable to be separated. Lars Mendelson also appears to be in a great deal of pain, mentally and possibly physically. I would expect your empathetic nature to recognize that.
E.VAC: Hacking off piece of flesh hurts, too. Yet medical science now allows us to remove dangerous growths and repair damaged bodies.
E.VAC: ...provided you don't mangle this one.
Guess I got a little reckless!
Obsydian Fyre: You claim to believe that Alexandra is dead and only I reside in this body. You appear to be contradicting yourself.
E.VAC: Enh, whatever. Probably a stupid idea anyway.
Obsydian Fyre: Also, I understood that you had a vehement dislike of the Circle of Thorns, yet you seem to be advocating their methods.
E.VAC: Their methods? Hell no. They're at the leech end of medicine.
E.VAC: Sometimes a good idea is a good idea, regardless of source.
Obsydian Fyre: A means to an end. My previous comrades, the Nictus, would approve of your thoughts.
E.VAC: It's not like I'd be taking a human life. Or even an innocent one.
Obsydian Fyre: No. Though you do have experience in that area.
E.VAC: Yeah. And? I'm up front with it. Are you?
Obsydian Fyre: I am an observer, not a destroyer. I have previously forced two mergings with humans, long before you walked this planet, when I did not understand humans and thought them an inferior life form.
E.VAC: So you've never killed? Not even another Kheldian?
Obsydian Fyre: I have had no wish to or need to. I have observed many conflicts, but have not participated.
E.VAC: Yeah, right.
E.VAC: Pull the other one.
Obsydian Fyre: I see how you may find that difficult to accept, given your history.
E.VAC: My history? I've gone toe-to-toe with Nictus, Galaxy, War Wolf, Vampyr... hell, I fought Requiem, possibly the grand-daddy of your kind.
E.VAC: I think there's far more reason to distrust you than to trust you. Even aside from the current personal issues.
Obsydian Fyre: And how many innocents have you killed, previous to your forced conversion, healer?
E.VAC: It's a matter of public record. My criminal file holds the complete list.
E.VAC: The real question is: do you mean how many died because of what I did? Or how many have I personally killed?
Obsydian Fyre: It matters little, nor do I care. Alexandra was able to look past your criminal history, but your treatment and betrayal of her was too much to overlook.
E.VAC: My* betrayal of *her*!? Of everyone in her life and around her, I was always there! I gave her everything I had! Heart! Soul! Hell, I did everything but die for her, though that was a near miss more than a couple times!
E.VAC: I needed her to be there ONCE. Just. Once. And she wasn't. And it's because of *you*.
Obsydian Fyre: I see that you have been traumatized by recent occurrences, perhaps as much as Alexandra was. However, I cannot see how you place the blame at her feet.
E.VAC: I don't. I place it at yours.
E.VAC: or the anatomical equivalent.
Obsydian Fyre: My place is not to understand, and I care little for your thoughts or opinions. Alexandra, due to her human nature and enforced social values, does.
E.VAC: But she cares for yours more. A complete stranger.
Obsydian Fyre: You are mistaken, human. Alexandra no more desired the merging than I did, but had little choice. Death was not an acceptable substitute.
E.VAC: Yeah. And you took advantage of that situation. Convinced her that accepting you was the only alternative to death.
]E.VAC: Except now, she might as well *be* dead. Since she's not the same person any more. Just your little chauffeur.
E.VAC: Tell me: how long did you have to whisper in her head before you had her convinced you were female?
E.VAC: Or did you borrow from the female authority figures that have tortured her her entire life, knowing it'd be easier to control her that way?
Obsydian Fyre: You are making judgments from a perspective that makes it impossible for you to understand the situation you describe, and your own prejudices are coloring your judgment.
E.VAC: you can't sway 'em with logic, dazzle them with BS. You swallow a dictionary?
Obsydian Fyre: Taking the first part of your illogical argument, what knowledge of yours convinces you that Alexandra is not the same person she was?
E.VAC: I knew her for months. You've had, what? Days? You can probably dip into her memories or something, but not a word or gesture you've made since I got back has been the Alexandra I knew.
Obsydian Fyre: Is it your all-spanning knowledge of the variances of human Kheldian merger? The time you spent with her since her own merger?
Obsydian Fyre: I believe your anger at your own situation and the depth of guilt you feel from Alexandra's experiences blinded you to her in the few hours you have spent with her recently.
E.VAC: Two telling points, squid: she wasn't there when I needed her and she... you haven't shown an ounce of compassion for what I went through.
Obsydian Fyre: I have no compassion for you, human. I may have, if I had not heard of and experienced your actions for the past few days. Alexandra may have had some for you, had you not presented her only with your anger and disgust.
E.VAC: Yeah, you're such a saint.
E.VAC: I noticed how much compassion you were showing Mason.
E.VAC: I'm surprised he didn't fall down from the caring and affection.
Obsydian Fyre: I believe Alexandra is perplexed by Masonry's condition, as am I. I also believe that Alexandra and Masonry reached a type of understanding between themselves. I would imagine Masonry has no complaints, nor the anger that you possess about the current situation.
E.VAC: Mason had a chance to build up to what happened to him. He'd accepted it long before.
E.VAC: I crave your highness' pardon if the fact that my own... experience kinda... snuck up on me.
Obsydian Fyre: Yes, I agree, from what I know.
Obsydian Fyre: As did Alexandra's.
E.VAC: Yet, oddly... her compassion... or more accurately, yours... was for the one who... oh! Had bonded with a Kheldian. How odd.
Obsydian Fyre: Yet your attitude lacks not only compassion, but also adds anger and disgust, adding to whatever pain, physical or emotional, that Alexandra may be experiencing.
E.VAC: So instead of bonding over the suddenness and shock, you chose to bond with the one who's now a Kheldian. Like you.
Obsydian Fyre: Alexandra felt a kinship with Masonry over the Kheldian merger. But she also felt a bond with the one who accepted her as she is, and did not look on her with fear, anger, and disgust.
E.VAC: So sorry for freaking out over the alien squid that's now possessing my friend.
E.VAC: I should've jumped right into your tentacles and embraced you.
Obsydian Fyre: Insincere apologies and sarcasm directed at me accomplish nothing.
E.VAC: Oh, I beg to differ. They make me feel pretty good.
E.VAC: And I'll bet, deep down in a place you're not ready to show yet, it's pissing you off, too.
Obsydian Fyre: If a selfish need to improve your mood by causing the woman you, occasionally, claim to care for and love is your goal, you succeed last night.
E.VAC: You are not her. That person I spoke to last night was not her.
Obsydian Fyre: I am not her. Correct. She is hiding in a place I cannot access because she was unable to accept your rejection on top of her most recent traumas. The person you spoke to last night was her. I do not know if you'll ever get the chance to speak with her again, however.
E.VAC: It can't be. 'Cause if it is... was... no. It can't be. It just... just can't.
Obsydian Fyre: I would ask you again what true facts make you believe that is so. However, I believe you to be too unreasonable to answer the question honestly.
E.VAC: IT CAN'T BE!! Don't you get it? Your vast alien intellect? If you're still her... if she's still alive...
E.VAC falls to his knees
Obsydian Fyre watches impassively.
E.VAC: ...then she was right about me... I'm not strong enough... I couldn't be there... I didn't... can't...
E.VAC: I failed...
E.VAC: Failed her... failed myself... failed Jen... failed Mason...
E.VAC: YOU CAN'T BE HER!!
Obsydian Fyre: You were unable to aid Alexandra at a critical point. I believe she reasonably knows and accepts that. However, continuing to fail her and others is your choice.
E.VAC starts to lunge at Fyre... but stops short, blinking, jaw dropped open...
Obsydian Fyre watches curiously, and stops talking, waiting.
E.VAC collapses backward on the grass
Obsydian Fyre: I am not her. And I am glad she was not here to witness that.
E.VAC: ...I failed... failed... he was right... she was right... failed... failed... failed...
E.VAC rocks back and forth, eyes unfocused.
Obsydian Fyre continues to watch impassively, showing no reaction.
E.VAC stops and sits up straight
E.VAC: Sorry there. Must've zoned out for a sec. We done here or what?
Obsydian Fyre narrows her eyes ever so slightly in thought.
E.VAC:...what?
Obsydian Fyre: Do you recall the previous few minutes of interaction?
E.VAC: Of course. You made some snarky comment about making myself feel better by making you feel bad.
E.VAC frowns in thought for a moment
Obsydian Fyre: Ah. You're missing time.
E.VAC: I'm what? Did we go through a portal or something? Or a Madness Mage?
E.VAC leaps up lightly and looks around
Obsydian Fyre: No. I believe the cause may be due to your trauma, or your inability to accept the current situation, or perhaps by the experiments you recently endured.
Obsydian Fyre: I have no way to know, however.
E.VAC:...riiight... I think I'd remember if I was suffering blackouts.
E.VAC:...you know what I mean.
Obsydian Fyre: Your medical training and your common sense, assuming you posses such, should tell you otherwise.
E.VAC: I mean the Longbow guys would've said something. Or the doctors. Why wouldn't they share any symptoms I was exhibiting with me?
Obsydian Fyre: I'm certain I cannot begin to guess their motives, nor would I attempt to, assuming of course they observed such symptoms.
Obsydian Fyre: You begin to weary me, human. This was not the agreement I reached with Alexandra.
E.VAC: I've been told I have that effect.
E.VAC looks distant for just a moment...
E.VAC: On the other hand, you can probably still use my help. Get back your buddy from the Thorns.
Obsydian Fyre: I would share with you your actions of which you've forgotten, but you would not believe anything I had to say or show you, so I will not.
E.VAC hesitates
E.VAC: You'd probably be making it up anyway.
Obsydian Fyre: If your mental abilities were stronger, I believe my thoughts are close enough to the surface now that Alexandra has retreated that you could read directly from my mind. I do not imagine your abilites will let this occur, however.
E.VAC sighs heavily.
E.VAC: I'm not a mind-reader. Just an empath.
E.VAC: The most I'd get is how you feel about what you're trying to show me. And hell, I might not even get that.
E.VAC: You Khelds don't feel the same way humans do. Throws off my powers a bit.
Obsydian Fyre appears to think for a moment, and then looks at E.VAC curiously.
Obsydian Fyre: You told Alexandra once that you could feel a lie. Correct?
E.VAC frowns a little
E.VAC: Yeah, most the time. I'm about as accurate as a polygraph.
E.VAC: Why?
Obsydian Fyre: Why did you not use that ability when you spoke to Alexandra last night?
Obsydian Fyre: Or as you speak to me currently?
E.VAC: Becau...
E.VAC: I've never used it on her. Any use of my powers on her made her flinch. So I had to be as light and unintrusive as possible while still protecting and healing her.
E.VAC: I've gotten so used to holding my empathic nose around her... the thought never occurred to me.
E.VAC chuckles darkly
E.VAC: You think I reacted with digust to you, squid. You should dive into those memories and see how disgusted she was about my powers.
Obsydian Fyre: With ample reason, human. Alexandra was a very traumatized young woman when you met her. She had begun to heal, but I fear you have put her further back in her recovery than she has ever been.
E.VAC: She... you didn't exactly put a Band-Aid on my scars either.
Obsydian Fyre: And still when a possible solution to the current difficulty has arise, you think only of yourself.
E.VAC: Ah, now see... she'd never willingly allow me to scan her. She'd be repulsed by the very idea, even before all... this.
E.VAC frowns
Obsydian Fyre: She has chosen to relinquish control to me, for the moment. I believe any fear she may have of your mental abilities is outweighed by the damage the current situation is causing.
E.VAC: ...but... if you're not her... then why not just go ahead, get the truth, see what happens. Why am I hesitating?
E.VAC: But what if I'm wrong? Then I'd be doing the worst thing I could possibly do to her...
E.VAC: Is the knowing worth the... the doing?
Obsydian Fyre: The worst thing? I am not sure anything is worse than what you have done and are doing.
E.VAC: ...or maybe this is some kind of trick. You know I have trouble reading alien minds. What if you can just show me what you want me to see? Then I'd just be damning myself *and* falling into your trap.
Obsydian Fyre studies E.VAC for a long moment.
Obsydian Fyre: It is possible for me to become dormant. She would lose all the abilities she gained as a Warshade, and I will be all but nonexistent.
E.VAC: I, uh... I don't know what to do.
E.VAC looks a little confused.
E.VAC: You mentioned that the other day. Why is it important now?
Obsydian Fyre: If you claim to have difficulty to read Kheldian thoughts, there should be no Kheldian left to interfere.
E.VAC: Emotions. I read emotions.
Obsydian Fyre: As you say.
E.VAC: And no. That'd be worse. I'd be reading the part of you that's still her. And I won't do that. She wouldn't want me to.
Obsydian Fyre: And yet you claim she no longer exists.
E.VAC glares at Fyre
E.VAC: Not helping.
Obsydian Fyre: Simply pointing out the flaws in your logic, since you seem to be unable to see them.
E.VAC: How about this: in your Nova form, you're just about as close to being pure Kheldian as you can be without seperation. I'll take my chances with my ability or inability to read you... and we'll go from there.
E.VAC: That way I'm not breaking my promise to never read her.
Obsydian Fyre: Simple enough. As you wish, then.
E.VAC winces a little
E.VAC: Okay...
E.VAC swallows hard
E.VAC: I'm, uh... going to try and... um... eliminate as much interferences as, uh... as possible.
E.VAC: Are you... do you agree to this?
Obsydian Fyre: As long as you do no harm to Alexandra or myself, do as you will.
E.VAC: Well, barring any weirdness, this shouldn't hurt a bit.
E.VAC: Breaking new ground and all that.
Obsydian Fyre: I will warn you, however.
Obsydian Fyre: As you have no reason to trust me, I have none to trust you. If you attempt any harm, I will stop you.
E.VAC reluctantly strips off his gloves and rolls up his sleeves. His arms are criss-crossed with burns, needle-marks, and ugly green scars.
E.VAC: Kind of expected that. No worries.
E.VAC gently... no, reluctantly lowers his hands onto the Nova-form's "head".
0E.VAC: Okay... um... talk to me. Tell me something boring.
Obsydian Fyre: Something boring? What do you consider boring? The climate of this place, perhaps? The sound of the birds here?
E.VAC sighs impatiently
Obsydian Fyre: Your thought processes are not mine, human. Explain yourself.
E.VAC: Just pick something. A verifiable fact, maybe.
E.VAC: What is the color of the rock over there?
Obsydian Fyre: The rock is grey, with streaks of brown.
E.VAC: Okay. Are my hands warm or cold?
Obsydian Fyre: Your hands are within the variable of human temperature, slighty toward what you would call warm.
E.VAC chuckles in spite of himself
E.VAC: Okay, what's your name?
Obsydian Fyre: My name is--
Obsydian Fyre makes a series of unintelligible sounds.
E.VAC blinks
Obsydian Fyre: Which in human languages would most resemble Cal'Thle'Serra.
Obsydian Fyre: Translated to English, the closest wording would be Obsidian Fire.
E.VAC: Huh.
E.VAC: Okay. Umm... now...
E.VAC take a deep breath and blows it back out
E.VAC: Tell me what happened to Alexandra.
Obsydian Fyre: Specify the time frame.
E.VAC mutters under his breath
E.VAC: Tell me how you first found her.
Obsydian Fyre: I was observing the beings you call Devouring Earth on a small island near the place you call Talos. I observed several different types of light flashes in the distance. As I came closer, I heard shouting and explosions. I found a group of humans, with one fighting the rest. That one fell as I approached, and the others left.
E.VAC stands statue-still, though his skin pales a shade or two
Obsydian Fyre: Shall I continue?
E.VAC: ...then what?
Obsydian Fyre: I believed that one to be dead, and I approached to learn more. I saw the human still breathed, though the body was extensively damaged. The breathing stopped, and the human died.
E.VAC makes a strangled noise in his throat.
Obsydian Fyre: Using a power I now know is referred to as the "rise of the phoenix," the human, who I now know as Alexandra, revived herself, but lacked the ability to heal her body. She had seconds before a second, final death occured.
Obsydian Fyre: Using a rudimentary bonding technique, I was able to make myself known to her, and she somewhat to me. I was unwilling to cause her death by inaction, and so offered to merge with her, and share my power in order to allow her to keep her life.
Obsydian Fyre: After the bonding, I was able to use my own power and what remained of hers to get the body to a more populate area, where someone-- I am unaware of whom-- found the body and took it to the nearest medical facility.
E.VAC does not move, but tears shine in his eyes
E.VAC almost whispers:
E.VAC: Why didn't she come for me?
Obsydian Fyre: The body was extensively damaged, as I said. Also, as you know, Alexandra has an extreme fear of hospitals. As soon as she regained consciousness, she attempted to leave the hospital, doing herself more damage. The medical personnel were forced to use drugs to subdue her until she was healed enough to be discharged.
E.VAC:...when?
Obsydian Fyre: Two days before she met you on the train platform. Upon her release, she attempted to contact you, and was unable to do so. She believed that you simply did not return her calls. She had no way of knowing of your detainment, and assumed you had returned as planned.
E.VAC: That was when Longbow found me...
E.VAC: ...that was right after... right after I failed...
E.VAC: I couldn't take it any more... he was right... they were all right... nobody was coming... he would end the pain... all I had to do was call him ma.... call him...
E.VAC yanks his hands back as though burned.
E.VAC: ...change back.
Obsydian Fyre: Have you come to your conclusion, then?
E.VAC: Please... let me see her...
E.VAC continues in a quiet, near-whisper...
E.VAC: I am sorry... I failed you... I failed... I wasn't strong enough... didn't love you enough... didn't have power enough...
Obsydian Fyre: Stop, human.
Obsydian Fyre: I wish not to hear your confessions, or whatever you may clasify them.
Obsydian Fyre: Alexandra perhaps should. Perhaps. I doubt more than ever your suitability for her. However, I believe the choice should be hers.
E.VAC: No. She was right about me all along. And you're right about me now.
E.VAC: He broke me, Serra. In the end... before Longbow got there... I called him... I called him "master".
Obsydian Fyre: I fail to comprehend the consequences of such a use of a false title.
E.VAC: I gave up. On my friends... on my daughter... on everything. He told me I was not worth rescuing. And I... I believed him.
E.VAC: anything to make it stop...
E.VAC suddenly self-conscious, rolls down his sleeves and straps back on his gloves.
Obsydian Fyre: From my perspective, you now have the chance to make up for any failure, real or imagined. By choosing not to do so, the result would be continued real failure.
E.VAC: I... I don't know where to begin...
Obsydian Fyre: My role as observer has already been compromised, both my Alexandra's inaction, and my own action. Had I advice to give you, I would not. However, you are a relatively intelligent human, I suppose. I believe you may figure that out.
E.VAC: I don't suppose an apology would cover my offense to you.
Obsydian Fyre: I am not the one to whom you need to apologize. However, I do think apologies will not make up for your offenses against Alexandra.
E.VAC: No, I think I do need to apologize to you as well. Or make it up to you.
E.VAC: But yes. Apologies...
E.VAC sighs heavily
E.VAC: I know that won't be enough. Not by a long shot.
E.VAC rubs his eyes
E.VAC: Damn you for telling me the truth. And damn me for... well, never mind.
E.VAC: Guess I should let you two talk.
Obsydian Fyre: As I have said, I cannot currently reach her.

And that was the end. I think it was something like 3am, my time, so we stopped.

Let me say, I love Serra. Love, love, love. Or, I would if she was someone else’s character. She’s freakin’ hard to play. For one thing, she has no sense of humor. None. That means no dumb jokes, and not even any sarcasm. Do you know how hard that is for me? No sarcasm? Practically impossible. Mason thinks Fyre is “cold?” He should meet Serra sometime. Serra feels little and shows nothing.

The game is very stingy where it comes to information on Kheldians. You pick up some during the Kheldian arcs, and some during the Moonfire task force. I think they purposely leave a lot open for the player to decide. Nice, but it can cause some confusion. My interpretation of Warshades may not agree with, or might even completely conflict, with someone else's. In fact, odds are good that it does conflict with some, which directly conflict with yet others. I try to keep information sketchy, largely because of those things. I did the same with the Warshade I deleted, who had one of my favorite backstories, by way. I've done it, too, with my Peacebringer

Serra was a Nictus, and though, as she says, she didn’t participate in murders, or whatever other assorted atrocities the Nictus are involved in, she watched. She’s not exactly guilty, but she’s not innocent, either. She doesn’t bring the point up, but she wouldn’t deny it, either. Also, sticking with her role as an “observer,” as she says, she rarely talks to Fyre or reacts to situations.

The other tough thing is purely a flaw with me. I know big words. I’ve been known to pull them out occasionally, even. But, I don’t use them. I'm perfectly capable of using and understanding proper, formal language. But I don't. If I spoke like a text-book in my normal, day-to-day life, especially at work, people would think I was cracked. Serra, however, hardly knows slang, or informal grammar.

With all this, "breaking character" is going to happen, and quickly. Chances are good that no one will ever see Serra again. Or at least, not long, and very, very rarely.

More About Fyre

Yes, the time stamp is correct. I sleep weird sometimes. You'll get used to it.

I managed to fit a lot of Fyre's history in the story I posted, more than I expected, really, but I didn't really get much of her personality in it. After comments made in the game and in other places, in character and out, I get the feeling that I'm not really getting it out well in the game, either. I'm not really into melodrama. And I should correct myself twice on that statement. First, I should say it's hard for me to do. And secondly, I should define "melodrama," as big and overt. Maybe it's because, like I've said before, I'm new to the RP thing. "Melodrama," makes me feel a little silly. I think, though, that I've been a little too subtle with some aspects of Fyre's character, which has, in a way, caused me and Fyre to mislead people.

For instance, Frost and Mason, in character and out, have referred to Fyre as "strong," or things similar. The word that's always come to me when thinking of Fyre is "brittle." She's been broken, which is another word that's come up a lot lately. She's glued herself back together, but there are cracks where she'll break again. The pieces all have sharp edges, which someone usually gets cut on. Usually it's someone else, but sometimes it is, and will be, Fyre.

We're going to see some of that "broken" once the team gets to Malta again. Especially the first mission. In fact, I'm hoping their first Malta mission comes on the smaller team, because it's probably going to be bad, and there's not a whole lot I can do about it. There was a Malta ambush that belonged to someone already. It wasn't that big a deal, because it was quick. It was over before she or I had a chance to do much of anything. And, she could run. And she did. That was the quickest team quit I've done outside of a bad PuG.

It's important to note the "herself" in the "glued herself back together," too. She's never had anyone to count on. Definitely not her mother, and though she considers her father to be the only person who's ever truly cared for her, he wasn't around much, and has been dead since she was a teen-ager. She's never encountered anyone who didn't want something from her: money, the prestige of being around her, sex, something. Her friendships have been superficial, and often based on competition; other girls like she was, shallow and vain. She's matured and evolved since she's acquired powers, but the shallowness and vanity still remain, in much smaller doses, and she continues to see that in herself.

Everyone she's ever let get close to her has betrayed or abandoned her. That's at least partly why she's been able to forgive E and Mason their various transgressions. She expects to be hurt, more by someone close to her, which is of course why doesn't let people close to her often. E worked hard to get close to her. He made a concentrated effort, and it's worked well. Off and on, at least. Mason's been a slower process, with less effort on Mason's part, but over a longer period of time. She told Mason that any of them would have done anything for the others, and that's true from her point of view. Or at least once was. As things stand, right this minute, she would again. She still cares for both of them. How and why would certainly fill another entry, so I'll skip past that for now.

They've both lost the trust that they'd gained from her. She trusts E with her life, but not her emotions, at the moment. Again. She's beginning to trust Mason again, possibly with more than she did. During the recent Strym drama, she said to Mason, referring to the locket that Strym offered her, "I trust you with it." Deconstructed, "I trust you," is remarkable. It's a big step for her to use that phrase with anyone, much less Mason. She qualifies the statement with "with it," but later drops the phrase. The use of the words and the meaning behind them startled her when she first used it. The words and the sentiment are exceedingly rare for her.

I'll try to cover what I've forgotten or can't seem to think of at the moment tonight or tomorrow. I also hope to get the E/Serra conversation posted tonight.

Sessions I

I was going to finish editting and post the E/Serra conversation today, but I had an inspiration sometime during the night. I want to post Fyre's backstory at some point. So, why not do it in a story? But, Fyre doesn't talk about herself. So, how to force her to do that? Well, how about putting her in therapy? It works for everyone else. I like to write, and often read things written in, first person, but, again, Fyre doesn't talk about herself. So, I sort of forced her, and we get to listen in, a little. Possibly the first in a series.

She enters the office with trepidation. She’d been here before and knew what to expect. It didn’t help. She’d met Dr. Connors and he struck her as sort of bland. Fifyish, nice looking, but not too good-looking. It looked as though he’d been put together entirely to blend in, not to intimidate. Her mother always said, “Don’t look intimidated, and you won’t be intimidated.” Like most of her mother’s advice, that wasn’t helping her much now.

She knows the “therapists” at Valley View shouldn’t reflect on anyone else in the mental health field. Shouldn’t. So why does she feel like she's going to have a heart attack since the moment she’d stepped into the waiting room?

“This is a bad idea,” she announces from the doorway, without planning to say it out-loud.

Dr. Connors looks up from his tablet and looks at her from across the room. “Why do you say that?” When she only shakes her head, he motions her further into the room. “You may as well come in the rest of the way. And close the door behind you.”

She takes a deep breath and takes another step into the room. Closing the door behind her feels like sealing a tomb. That thought, that over-exaggerated, melodramatic thought, and the realization of it gives her the strength to take a few more steps and sit on the couch across from Connor’s chair.

“You’re very nervous,” Connors observes. Brilliantly, she thinks. “Why is that?”

“I don’t like doctors,” she says. It comes out as a whisper. She crosses her legs and smoothes her skirt, trying to cover the weakness in her voice.

Connors nods. “We spoke briefly last week. You seemed much calmer.”

“I was leaving then,” she says.
Connors tilts his head in question. “You’ll be leaving in an hour.”

She nods. She’s looking at her hands on her skirt, looking at the manicured fingernails. She’s realized this is going to be harder than she thought. She looks up and toward the door.

“I’ve seen your medical records, of course,” Connors says. He speaks more quietly, as if not to startle her. “I know you were hospitalized at Valley View, and I’ve seen your court testimony.” He pauses, indicating the next question has nothing to do with the previous statement, but she knows that’s not the case. “Why did you decide to see a therapist after all this time?”
“
Ma-- my… friend is seeing one, a colleague of yours, and it seems to be helping him.” After thought, she adds under her breath, “Sort of.”

Connors nods. “Well, since we don’t know each other very well, why don’t we start at the beginning.”

“The beginning of what?” She’s feeling a little better. She straightens and brushes her hair back, feeling some confidence come back.

Connors smiles at her. “Of your life. Childhood memories. What was your childhood like?” He smiles again when she automatically rolls her eyes at the clichéd question. She suspects he asked it at least partly just to see what her reaction would be to it. When she doesn’t answer, he says,
“A lot of what I do is listening to what you want to tell me.”

She shifts slightly in her seat. “All right.” A pause while she thinks. “I was adopted. You probably know. It’s not a secret, or anything. I don’t remember a time not knowing that. My biological mother gave me up when I was a baby. My father’s not listed on the birth certificate, and she died about a year after she gave me up-- a car crash-- so no one can ask her. My parents, my adoptive parents, didn’t have any other children. My father was almost twenty years older than my mother, so maybe they couldn’t. I don’t really know.”

She stops and Connors lets her be silent for a minute. “What kind of childhood did you have?” He prompts her when it becomes clear she’s waiting for the next question.

She shrugs. “It was good. I was spoiled. Very. When my parents took trips, they’d have to buy more luggage to fit all the things that they brought me back.”

“They took a lot of trips?”

She knows what he’s really asking. “Yes. Especially my mother. She wasn’t home much. She worked… was with a few charities, and she was busy with that, or social things. My father worked, I mean really worked, hard for his company. He tried to be around for me, but a successful business takes a lot of hard work and long hours.”

“I’ve seen pictures of your mother in newspapers and such. She works with one of the AIDS charities, doesn’t she?”

She shrugs. “I could never keep track. Whatever’s trendy at the moment, usually.”

There’s the briefest flash of a frown before the impassive therapist face comes down again. “Your father is deceased?”

She nods. “He died of a heart attack when I was fifteen, about twelve years ago.” She looks away and knows he'll keep asking until she tells him, so she adds, “In his office, at home. I came home from school and found him. We were supposed to be going to dinner.”

Connors writes something down in his notebook. She feels a twinge of irritation, examines it, focuses on it. It’s much easier to get angry than to concentrate on whatever else she may be feeling.

“How did that effect you?”

The irriation blooms to full-fledged anger. “How did it effect me? How do you think? He was the only person who cared about me. I hate my mother--” She stops instantly, realizing what she’s said aloud.

Connors merely glances at her.

She shrugs. “I do, I guess. I just hadn’t planned on announcing it so soon. It’s not like she’s my real mother. And she didn’t try to be. She thought it was cute, for awhile, I guess, having a little girl. When I was little, she used to dress us alike. She has really pale blond hair, and she used to have mine dyed to match. She got tired of it when I was around twelve or so, though I kept up the dying. I think, maybe, that she saw me as competition.

“Our relationship got a lot worse after my father died. Either she wasn’t there at all or we were screaming and throwing things at each other. I started getting in some trouble after my father died, and I got kicked out of Saint Anne’s, my private school. Instead of finding me another, she had me put in public school. Which, just gave me the chance to get into more trouble.” She shrugs. “I calmed down when I got to college. Mostly. Did the sorority thing, and all that..”

“What did you want to do after college?” Connors asks when she doesn’t go on.

She smiles slightly. “Get married. My mother conditioned me well enough that it’s all I ever really expected to do. I was meant to be a society wife, like my mother. My father was “new money,” he earned it. But my mother comes from old Philadelphia money. That’s what the women do.”

“You’ve never been married, though,” Connors says, flipping a few pages.

“No. I was engaged. To a doctor,” she says the word with disgust unintentionally. Realizing what she did, she glances at Connors but sees no reaction. “We… broke up.”

“Your choice?”

She gives a bark of laughter. “Yes.”

Connors raises an eyebrow and waits.

She sighs. “He had me committed. Him and my mother. After… the hospital… burned down, I broke up with him. Well, I never really told him that, but I wouldn’t see him or talk to him. Or my mother.”

Connors flips through more papers. “The records of your commitment were lost when Valley View burned. Would you tell me why you were committed?”

She starts to say something, snap at him, but stops. She knows it’s not him that’s made her angry, frightened. She had been having hallucinations, daytime nightmares, brought on by her evil ancestor and a demon both trying to posses her. She’s not ready to talk about that part of her life with him, so she decides on the other part of the truth. “My mother wanted, wants, my money. My father left everything to me, including the house we lived in. My mother has some money of her own, and I never tried to… evict her from the house, but it wasn’t enough for her. Philip went along with her. That’s my ex-fiance, Philip. The doctor. Well, plastic surgeon.” Dr. Phil, E always called him. She frowns slightly, and to stay on track, she automatically answers the question everyone seems to ask next, “No, he never touched me.”

She realizes what she said and feels a blush color her cheeks. “I mean, I never had any plastic surgery. By him or anyone else.”

Connors smiles at her.

“I moved here, after… after I broke up with him.” She’s afraid he’s going to go back to talking about the hospital if she doesn’t keep talking, but she doesn’t know what to talk about. She feels herself getting nervous and frightened, and gets angry at herself for her reaction. “I’ve been here for almost a year now. I bought an apartment, over on Talos Island. There’s a lot of traffic in that area, but I have the top two floors, so the noise doesn’t travel up much, unless you’re on the roof. I’ve been thinking of buying a vacation house. Well, I have two, actually, but I mean one of my own. Or, maybe an island.”

Connors flips pages again. “It says that you’re unemployed?”

She smiles slightly. She’s still not ready to share some things, so she doesn’t think to mention her “job.” “That’s right. I show up at company meetings occasionally, and sometimes even sign checks, but that’s not a ‘job.’ Other that that, well, I’ve never worked a day in my life. Why start now? I certainly don’t need to.”

Connors nods He looks at his pages again.

She looks toward the closed door and feels panic start to set in slowly. The more she tries to push it back, the more it creeps in on her. Serra had encouraged her in this, but Serra’s not there now, now when she needs the help, a calm voice.

Suddenly, her phone rings. The quiet electronic music causes her to freeze in fear. The last breath she took burns her lungs until she forces it out. She fumbles in her purse at her feet for her phone, checking the caller ID.

“I have to take this,” she says briskly to Connors and walks out the door without waiting for his reaction. A minute later, she walks back in, scopping her bag off the floor and dropping the phone back inside.

“I have to go,” she tells him.

Connors looks at his watch, a heavy pale gold affair discretely tucked under his shirt cuff. “We still have fifteen minutes.”

She shrugs. “Give it to the next guy.”

His lips purse. “We’ll talk next week, then.”

“Maybe,” she says over her shoulder on her way out the door.

Tomorrow, I promise to get the E/Serra stuff up. Promise!

Fyre and E, Part 2

Okay, so we’ve left E and Fyre in the midst of an argument. They just left a mission, and now they (and their players) can focus on fighting with each other, instead of the Thorns.

(The last comment from earlier, to make the next make sense: Obsydian Fyre: They just can't see past your rough exterior to the warm caring inside, I suppose.)

E.VAC: That would mean I had one. Which I apparently don't.
Obsydian Fyre: Apparently not.
E.VAC: I've worked with all kinds. So long as you're on the right side, I can work with you. Now that I know I'm not actually dealing with my friend... well, it's just better I know where I stand.
E.VAC: Just don't expect me to trust you until you're ready to own up.
Obsydian Fyre: Fine, then. And as long I know you're just like everyone else I've ever know, just wanting to use me for something, and--
Interrupted by an ambush.
E.VAC: Yeah, that's what I did. Use you. Her. Whatever.
Obsydian Fyre: Oh, no. I guess you wanted to, but you never got the chance.
E.VAC: Oh, I had the chance. You obviously don't know what I'm capable of.
Obsydian Fyre: I think I've got a pretty good idea of what you're capable of, actually.
E.VAC: If you think everything you're saying you think, then you haven't the slightest clue.
Obsydian Fyre: What you think I think--
Obsydian Fyre stops and rubs her forehead.
Obsydian Fyre: What?
E.VAC: Forget it. I don't know you. You don't know me. Serra, was it? Nice to meet you. I'll be your grumpy healer apparently.
E.VAC: If you don't mind, I'd rather you forgot most the personal stuff I brought up. It's obviously not important any more.
Obsydian Fyre shakes her head.
Obsydian Fyre: Serra's here, but she's ignoring most of this. I'm still Alexandra, but if you can't deal with that, you can just call me Fyre.
E.VAC: You can't be her. You... she wouldn't have... She would've... No. You're not her.
Obsydian Fyre: Wouldn't have what?
E.VAC: Forget it. It's not important.
Obsydian Fyre: Wouldn't have what? What? Chosen to live? Well, I did. I thought I had things to live for. People. Obviously, I was wrong.
E.VAC slumps more than sits
E.VAC: You said it yourself. You found the one person who cared for you since your dad. I guess... I guess you never believed in me after all.
Obsydian Fyre: I did. I thought I did. But obviously, I was wrong, and I probably would have figured that out eventually, even if I hadn't been on the losing side of a Malta fight.
E.VAC: Maybe you were. Maybe if I'd... if I'd let myself... Maybe I would've been strong enough...
E.VAC: No. Even so. You never... *she* never would've taken shots at me like *that*.
E.VAC: ((more to himself)) ...would she?
Obsydian Fyre: I was right? I mean, wrong?
Obsydian Fyre shakes her head after a minute.
Obsydian Fyre: Forget it.
Obsydian Fyre: But I totally would have. You know I would have. I probably would have been worse, before.
E.VAC: No. You wouldn't have needed to. Before.
Obsydian Fyre: Yeah, I would have. I did. We fight, E. We always fight.
E.VAC: ...it seems so long ago. Like something out of a dream. Or the beginning part of a nightmare. The part where everything is perfect until...
Obsydian Fyre laughs.
Obsydian Fyre: Perfect? Not hardly.
E.VAC: Hm? Oh. I wasn't sure I'd said that out loud.
E.VAC: Anyway. I guess... well, in a way it was a lifetime ago. Learn from it, bury it, and move on. Can't live with it hanging around.
Obsydian Fyre: Maybe.
E.VAC straightens up a bit
E.VAC: I'm sorry I failed you. Her. Alexandra.
Obsydian Fyre crosses her arms and looks away.
Obsydian Fyre: And I'm sorry that I lived and disappointed you so badly.
E.VAC: Don't be sorry that you lived. You were doing what you felt you had to do.
E.VAC: The disappointment is my own problem. I'll just have to deal.
Obsydian Fyre:... what I felt I had to do? You... you really never did care about me, did you? I thought.... I hoped I was wrong, but...
Obsydian Fyre: You never.... I mean, wow...
Obsydian Fyre forces a laugh.
E.VAC: I cared about you more than I've ever cared for any human being on earth. But you never let me in. I thought I was okay with that... until I found out that a stranger was allowed where I was not.
E.VAC: Apparently, I should not have allowed myself to grow so attached. I will not make that mistake again.
Obsydian Fyre: I never let you in? What the hell does that mean? I told you things-- Attached? You--
Obsydian Fyre turns her head away and wipes at her eyes.
Obsydian Fyre: You're rationalizing, or whatever that is.
E.VAC: I am trying to adjust to the new situation.
E.VAC: Thinking that it might have been better if I'd just died... well, it just seems like the wrong thing for me.
E.VAC: Please tell me it was over quickly. That she didn't suffer as she died. I never could stand to see her in pain.
Obsydian Fyre: Shut up, E. You wouldn't have cared. You don't care.
E.VAC: I would have. I did.
E.VAC: And I don't.
Obsydian Fyre: I'll tell you, since you don't, then.
Obsydian Fyre looks straight at E.
Obsydian Fyre: It hurt, a lot. It hurt, and I was scared, and angry, and mostly scared. And alone. And the hospital was just as bad. And they wouldn't let me leave, not that I would have been able to if they let me.
E.VAC makes a strangled sort of sound, but holds himself still.
E.VAC: I... see...
Obsydian Fyre: But I did get out of the hospital. And I tried to call you, but you never answered. I thought you were back, but not answering my calls. So I was afraid to see you again, for that and everything had happened.
Obsydian Fyre: And, hey, since you don't care so much, want to see scars? I've got this really nifty one on the back of my neck.
Obsydian Fyre starts to lift her hair and glances at E.
Obsydian Fyre: No?
E.VAC: God... Fyre... how could you think that about me? When have I... when would I...
E.VAC: I would've kicked down the gates of hell to save you...
Obsydian Fyre: You're lying.
Obsydian Fyre: To me, yourself, it doesn't matter.
E.VAC takes off his glove and rolls up his sleeve. His arm is covered in burns, needle-marks, and green scars.
E.VAC: The gates kicked back.
Obsydian Fyre flinches and turns her head away.
Obsydian Fyre: That's not what I meant.
E.VAC rolls back down the sleeve and buckles back on the glove.
Obsydian Fyre: I don't blame you for not being there. Hell, if I hadn't been so... whatever that was, stupid, mostly.... to go off on my own, I wouldn't have... been in that situation.
Obsydian Fyre: I blame you for the way you've been acting for the past two days. Now.
E.VAC: Freaked out? Angry? Scared? Rejected? Put upon? Which part?
E.VAC: I kept telling myself that any minute, the door would explode in with great gouts of fire. That you'd somehow find me, level an entire laboratory complex, and come striding in like Hell's Wrath.
Obsydian Fyre: The part where you said you didn't-- The first half hour--
Obsydian Fyre: Maybe I would have if I'd been able. Who knows, now.
E.VAC: You don't blame me for not being there? Maybe so.
E.VAC: But I blame *you*.
Obsydian Fyre flinches back.
E.VAC: I can forgive Alexandra. After all, she was killed. But to my way of thinking... *you* killed her.
Obsydian Fyre: What?
E.VAC: I will work with you, Kheldian. Out of respect for her and for Mason. But know this: I blame you for the death of the woman I loved.
Obsydian Fyre looks completely confused and stunned.
E.VAC: Good night, Fyre. I have a motel bed that's been paid for. And I'd hate to waste taxpayer money by not crying myself to sleep in it.

Next time, I’ll post the log of the next night, when E gets to meet Serra.

What I Did With My Work Day: Fyre and E, Part 1

I’m supposed to be working. I have a rather large project that I haven’t even started on. I don’t have an internet connection where I am, so I thought I’d be safe from distractions. Oh, but I forgot about that chat logs saved on my laptop, didn’t I? What could a quick scan hurt, right? Well, here it is two hours later, and I’m still reading chat logs. So, at this point, I’m just going to go with it. I’ll post this when I get home.

The logs I have here are from when “Team 2.0” began. After Fyre and Mason’s transformations, and after E has been saved from his old boss, and the team met up again. The initial discussion is telling, but that’s not what I’m going on focus on at the moment. It was probably covered in Mason’s blog at some point, for one thing. For another, this is going to be long enough. I’m probably going to break this into at least two entries at it is. I think this is the base of E and Fyre’s relationship, as it is now, so even though it’s old, I’ll post it.

Briefly, though. E had a bad reaction to the Kheldians. It wasn’t overt, and it looks like Mason didn’t catch it, or it didn’t bother him. Fyre was having her own issues, so E’s reaction hit her much harder. Anytime E had a shocked, surprised, or disgusted reaction, she snapped at him. It got worse as the night went on. The next night, it kept getting worse, and exploded after Mason left them.

Again, remember, this all in the past. This is before Ben, before the team fractured from that.

During the first Warshade arc, the Circle is kidnapping Warshades. Significant here because Fyre knows E’s feelings about the Circle, and she’s seeing disturbing parallels.
Fyre: Well, you and the Circle have something in common, then.
E.VAC: Uhh... we do?
Obsydian Fyre: Your opinion of warshades, apparently.
E.VAC: Whatever.
More fighting, then:
E.VAC: Someone I thought I knew is now at least partly someone I don't. And the someone I don't isn't even human. Or corporeal.
E.VAC: It's not like I want to sacrifice you on an altar. I'm just not sure I know you.
A lot of this is through missions, but I’m just going to run it all together, because it’s a continious conversation.
Obsydian Fyre: You know, how about next time, I just die, to make the transition easier on you? Mase, too. We wouldn't want to make things difficult for you, I'm sure.
E.VAC:...thanks for that. Like I wasn't already beating myself up for that.
Obsydian Fyre: Yeah, right. I'm sure you were.
E.VAC: Like you know how I feel. Or care.
Obsydian Fyre: You've told us how you feel about the "things" that are, were, whatever, your friends.
E.VAC: At least I'm honest about being a little freaked. How long did it take 'til you... or the old you, anyway... to admit it was my empathic powers that freaked you out?
E.VAC: And after all that time spent in fear of someone touching your mind or getting into your head... well, now you've got someone in there. A complete stranger.
E.VAC: Somehow, it was okay for *that* reformed murderer to share head-space with you.
Obsydian Fyre: She's not a stranger. She's... she's probably the only person other than my father that actually cared about me.
Obsydian Fyre: You don't know anything about her.
E.VAC: Exactly.
Obsydian Fyre: At least she won't--
Obsydian Fyre: Forget it.
E.VAC: Say it.
Obsydian Fyre: No. You don't know what I was going to say, anyway.
E.VAC: I think I do. You were going to say she won't abandon you.
E.VAC: Like you think I did.
Obsydian Fyre: What does it matter what I was going to say, anyway? You've made it clear that you'd've rather I just died out there, instead of being this. Why don't you wait and you can give Mason a hard time next time you see him, and give me a break?
E.VAC: Because Mason actually cares about what happened to his friends.
Obsydian Fyre: Yes, he does.
Obsydian Fyre: So I don't care, is that what you're saying?
E.VAC: So it would seem.
E.VAC: Or maybe it's just that your new friend doesn't.
Obsydian Fyre: Ha, and Serra was trying to get me to go easier on you. Until you started referring to me as "that thing."
E.VAC: I'll bet.
E.VAC: What does it care about me? It's just happy to have a nice new body to inhabit.
Obsydian Fyre: She was actually plenty happy on her own. She saved me because no one else could, and there was no other way for her to do it.
E.VAC: Or so it tells you.
Obsydian Fyre: Quit calling her it.
E.VAC: Oh, I wouldn't want to make IT mad.
Obsydian Fyre: That's just childish, E.
E.VAC: Pot. Kettle. Accusations of African heritage.
Obsydian Fyre: And, continuing along the same theme.
E.VAC: Would you prefer "I'm rubber, you're glue"?
Obsydian Fyre: You're trying to irritate me by sticking to a small point, and ignoring the much larger picture. So, despite your stated opinion that you're simply following suit, yes, I'll still call that childish.
E.VAC: The large picture, as I see it, is that I spent the last two weeks being systematically tortured. I come home to find people I cared about died because I wasn't there and are now sharing head-space with alien beings neither they nor I know a bloody thing about. That about cover it?
Obsydian Fyre: No, it doesn't.
Obsydian Fyre: You're forgetting the part where you're acting like an ass about it.
E.VAC: Oh, then do enlighten me.
E.VAC: Oh, I'm so sorry I can't be instantaneously all right with the new situation. Maybe I ought to seek counseling about my inability to cope with my world being turned inside out.
Obsydian Fyre: Yeah, maybe you should. And it's not just your world, you know.
E.VAC: I'd talk to my best friend about it, since we were coming to care about each other a lot. But no, wait. She snarks at me every time I even mention what's bothering me.
Obsydian Fyre: No. You're wrong.
Obsydian Fyre: My first instinct was to help you with Jen. I was thinking what I could do, who I could call. But then you started... being a jerk about it.
E.VAC: I practically broke down in tears on the tram platform. Especially as Mas started talking about what he'd do to my ma... my old boss should he catch him. At what point was I a jerk about it?
Obsydian Fyre: The part where you could barely stand to stay on the tram platform once you found what had happened to Mase and me. "How could you let those things inside your head?" 'Cuz I could have chosen not to. I think you'd have been much happier with that decision.
E.VAC: If that's what you think, then you really aren't the Alexandra I knew.
Obsydian Fyre: Yeah, right. You're the same old E, for sure. Exactly what I should have expected. The only emotion you showed on that tram platform was disgust.
E.VAC: If our places were reversed, you'd be no different.
E.VAC: Or should I say *Alexandra* would've been no different. I'm not sure at all how *you'd* react.
Obsydian Fyre: If our places were reversed, I'd be happy my friends were alive, and I'm be working with them to figure out solutions to all our issues.
E.VAC: Bull. You're not even doing that now.
Obsydian Fyre: No, I'm certainly not. I'm very much doubting that you are, or for that matter ever were my friend.
E.VAC: Forget about me. What's the last kind word you said to Mas? What've you done to help him deal with his situation?
Obsydian Fyre: And you? When you weren't freaking out over a little eye-glow?
E.VAC: You're the one who said you'd be acting like Saint Alexandra in my shoes. I admit to having a hard enough time catching up with my own problems right now.
Obsydian Fyre: I don't know what to do for Mason. I don't even quite understand what's going on there. He's acting strange, but he's not the same Mason we knew, so.... Maybe it's not really strange.
Obsydian Fyre: But, you... Ha. I was still thinking of things I could do to help last night. How dumb am I.
E.VAC: Here's a suggestion: act like a friend instead of slamming me for daring to mention my problems.
E.VAC: Oh, but then you'd actually have to be my friend instead of... whatever you are now.
Obsydian Fyre: I'm "slamming" you for exactly what you did there. I'm a "thing," a "whatever." Why would I want to help someone who talks to me, and thinks of me like that?
E.VAC: You explode and turn into a flying squid that shoots lasers out of its eyes!
E.VAC: How am I not supposed to be freaked out?
Obsydian Fyre: Do you think this was what I planned on? I had a choice: death, or this. I chose. If you would have rather I made another choice, that's your problem. I'm adjusting. You'll either have to do the same, or stay away from me.
Obsydian Fyre: If you're that disgusted, or "freaked out," go away.
Obsydian Fyre: You are good at going away.
E.VAC: You're not giving me a chance to adjust. You're asking me to be okay with this right now. In the middle of every...
E.VAC: Now that's not fair and you damn well better know that.
E.VAC: I was only supposed to be gone for a weekend. Instead, I was gone for almost two weeks. Did you do anything about that? No.
E.VAC: It wasn't my friends who came and saved my ass. It was frickin' Longbow. Co-workers. People being paid to do the job.
Obsydian Fyre: Oh, so sorry, I was busy getting killed by Malta. And then spending time in the hospital where they had to drug me up to keep me there.
Fyre has an extreme fear of hospitals, which I’ll cover in another entry
E.VAC: So you're excused but I'm not. Spiffy. Glad to know where I stand.
Obsydian Fyre: I wasn't asking for or offering an excuse.
E.VAC: Asking for? No. You've already gone and assumed that I wasn't there for you by choice.
E.VAC: Offering? Oh, yeah. You've done nothing *but* make excuses.
Obsydian Fyre: For what? I don't have anything to make excuses for.
E.VAC: Of course not. You're perfect.
Obsydian Fyre: I am? No, definately not. I certainly never have been, and I don't expect to be now.
Obsydian Fyre: You, on the other, hand...
Obsydian Fyre: "Saint Alexandra," you said. More like Jason Pace, martyr.
Obsydian Fyre: He cares for everyone and everything, but no one feels his pain.
E.VAC: Now I know you're not her any more.
Obsydian Fyre: Oh, I'm definately me. But I had some time to think recently, and I've been listening to you go on about how much you cared for me, and how we were best friends.
E.VAC: Were you thinking? Or was *it* thinking for you?
E runs off to kill some Thorns.
Obsydian Fyre: A pathetic little insult, and then you run away, because I hit a soft spot?
Obsydian Fyre: Dammit, E, what are you doing?
E.VAC: My job.
Obsydian Fyre: You idiot. Fine. Get smacked around by the Circle. Whatever.
E.VAC: Better than being smacked around by the thing that looks like my friend.
Obsydian Fyre: You know, I was only your "friend" once we got into dangerous, exciting situations and you decided you were attracted to me. It could have been worse, I could have shot you with a rocket launcher.
Fyre is referring to E’s ex-wife, who did indeed try to shoot him with a rocket launcher. Fyre thinks E’s attracted to her at least in part because she reminds him of his ex.
E.VAC: Even when she hated me because I had mind-powers, Alexandra never would've taken that cheap of a shot.
Obsydian Fyre: It wasn't a cheap shot, it's the truth.
E.VAC: Which just shows more that you're not her.
Obsydian Fyre: You'd rather I was dead than admit you're wrong.
E.VAC: You just keep adding to the proof with every word now. Why don't you just drop the act? It'd save us both a lot of time.
Obsydian Fyre: Why don't you stop being such an ass?
E.VAC: Because I *am* an ass.
Obsydian Fyre: Obviously. I knew that. I hate when I forget important stuff like that.
Obsydian Fyre: I was fooled for awhile. I started thinking maybe I was just a subsititute for your crazy ex... same situation, same pattern, and all. At least now I know I was right.
E.VAC: Of course you were.
Obsydian Fyre: Too bad I had to die for two minutes to figure it out. If I'd been dead for four minutes, I'd probably be a genius.
E.VAC: You've always known best. And now that you're an alien, hell, you probably know all kinds o' stuff.
Obsydian Fyre: Oh, no. You obviously know *much* more than I do.
E.VAC: I couldn't possibly. I only have *one* brain.
Obsydian Fyre: You do? I would have guessed less.
E.VAC: Oh, look: you're right again.
Obsydian Fyre: That hardly counts. It was too easy to figure out.
E.VAC: Gee, I suppose you're... well, golly. Right again.
Madness Mage: Your interference in our affairs ends here, Obsydian Fyre. But don't worry. No one will miss a Warshade.
Obsydian Fyre: See? All kinds of stuff in common with the Circle. "No one will miss a Warshade." E.VAC: Heck, no. I kinda feel for the Warshades. They're reformed criminals and murderers after all. Nothing wrong with that.
Obsydian Fyre: I guess meeting you was just preperation for meeting Serra, then. Although, I don't think she was much of a criminal or murderer. Maybe you can compare body counts some day.
E.VAC: Well, hell. You knew me for months and never let me in. You knew her for less than two minutes and made her a welcome guest.
E.VAC: Guess I was just too human for you.
E.VAC: Or is that the real reason you keep calling it "her"? I hear that's all the rage among superheroines these days.
Obsydian Fyre: Funny, when the alien is more "human" then you are.
E.VAC: Yeah, I should've been able to see the humanity in its compound eyes. Or the number of tentacles.
Obsydian Fyre: I think you're getting confused with the roaches in your hotel room.
E.VAC: I can see where that confusion would be easy.
Obsydian Fyre: Well, get used to it. I hear roaches are immune to radiation, so at least you'll have friends.
E.VAC: Apparently the roaches don't like me much, eh?
Obsydian Fyre: They just can't see past your rough exterior to the warm caring inside, I suppose.
Team task completed.

A bucket on his head! Get it?

I did a bunch of stuff off-line today, while I was supposed to be working. I'll post it after this. First, though, a laugh break before I post all the drama. I promised Mason I'd send the log, but instead of going through that, I'll just post it here.
It was Sunday evening, and Mason was rhapsodizing his love Carnies. Fyre wasn't happy. She hates Madeline Casey. They have a history. I'll post more when I get into Fyre's background-- I really, really need to get on that, I know. And Carnies just plain suck. They're tough. I don't like them, either. Mason's love of Carnies has been a running joke since we hit that level with the original team. He's really getting into his descriptions. Then, E says to Fyre and Kit, in local, "I'll bet when he's home alone, he puts on really ugly pants and wears a bucket on his head." Fyre and Kit break up. Back in team, Mason goes on, oblivious to the comment, "Plus I like beating the crap out of those Strongmen." E, Fyre, and Kit break up, more. Later, they finally get a Carnie mission, and they continue randomly giggling like demented school girls. I think Mason was still clueless. Finally, we start calming down. Then Frost says, "I get it, now." The characters AND the players laugh like fiends.